Tonned with Jurong yesterday. It was very 'exciting'. It was to Dayana, but not to me, seriously.

First, met Dayana at TPC and then headed to Jurong. Reached takraw court around 1030pm. Then Fatin came down, and me and Dayana went up to her house awhile. We saw the range of contacts her mother was selling. $15 for 3months ok! Lawa2 pulak tu contacts die. Wow. Lepak awhile upstairs, and then went down again. Then we shifted to Ahmad's block cause the boys wanna bathe. Then lepak2, skali saaaapp! Police la siot. Afew cabot, afew stayed. Yang cabt pasal ade bende2 yang tak patut ade. Then aku pon ikot pon cabot uh. HAHA. Skali Helmi called, the police suro patah alek. And they'll stay there till we come back. So terpakse. Then Dayana kene rabak sia. Police pompan tu mcm tooot! K then they asked us all to go home. They emphasized on me and dayana cause we stayed far. Then Helmi asked me and Dayana to follow him cause the police was eyeing us from afar. They were gonna make sure we went home.

Then we step cool know walk away, skali jalan past a block, teros lari sia. Naek atas block Fatin. Then Naz and Fatin met us. Then an unknown number called me. And I thought it was one of the boys or something calling cause we split up. Skali, saaaapp! Police tu call! Aku teros off handphone sak. They were like finding us cause they saw us run. They knew we didnt go home. Then Zul said, drg rounding2. Carik kite kot. Then Naz and Helmi brought us to some eerie place. I swear I gt the chills. It was bloody dark and it was a whole row of terrace. It was so quiet. Then we sat at the darkest playground I've ever seen, I swear. Then we msged Rudy, told them where we were and asked them to come over. Then Rudy asked us to go back there. I thought the police got them and we had to go back, so I didnt want to. Then Rudy said "nemind". So we didnt know if he was coming or not.

Then suddenly, we heard somebody whistle, twice. Something Rudy and co would do whenever they meet. So we thought it was them. And everybody started to signal that we were there. Naz whistled back, Dayana waved her hands up. But I was like feeling uneasy so I just sat down. Then Naz said, "Eh, tu torchlight pe?" Then Helmi said," Eh, tu bukan drg! Drg masey pat umah Mac." Then Helmi and Naz just asked us to walk out of that place. And then Fatin suddenly say, "Cepat jalan. Cept jalan, takmo puseng blakang. Takmo puseng blakang." And I was starting to freak out. I stayed close to Naz all the way. My legs were wobbly but they keep on urging me to not stop walking.

Then we went to a carpark. It was very dark and then they asked to rest there first. Then we were in the 'kanchiong' mode. They told what they saw. They said they saw a red light. And remember how we were not supposed to acknowledge these kind of things? Well, yeah. Naz acknowledged it. And Fatin saw the thing following us as we walked away. I started to freak out la please. I was the paleng lemah semangat one there and evrybody could see that. Then they were afraid it would follow me. Standing there, we knew it was there. We could feel it. Then Fatin asked me to hold her suratyassin. I was quiet all the way. I felt very weak from all the running and I havent had a proper meal. Plus I was like silently panicking inside.

Then for some reasons, we split up. Naz with Dayana, Fatin and Helmi with me. Helmi felt something pushing his left shoulder down all of a sudden. And he started reading prayers. Then Fatin got worried about me, which made myself more worried. All the way as we walked to Mac's house, Helmi walked behind me to read some prayers for me. He said it was to protect me from anything harmful. Then when we reached, I was feeling sooooooo uneasy I didnt even wanna sit. I kept on turning around to see if there was anybody there. They thought I kene sampok yknow! Lol. Mac dont want stand beside me. Lol. And they asked me to hold some biji things. They say if rase panas means I tersampok. Aiyo! Biken gua panas! Then Fatin said, "I know. You know it's still here right?" And I just kept quiet. Then Helmi bacekan doa for me, and then wipe some water on my face. I didnt know what he was doing, but I know he knows what he's doing. He was the one who led us in our prayers when Has passed away. I was sooo thankful to him okay. My kawan sejati what. Lol.

Then we lepak under Ahmad's block and around 5.30am, headed to Dayana's home. Sleeeeeeeppp~ Woke up, siap2, bussed to BukitBatok to watch them play takraw again. Then blabla, homed.

Crite aku dah mcm novel siot. HAHA. Mummy's still not home yet. It's 1am now. & I'm getting the chills. Aiyo.

Kao pat umah nie, takmo step mane peyh besar la sia. Batu Api! Suke per tngk adekberadek kao gado? Die tak ambek anak die, krg mengamok. Die nak ambek anak die, nanges2 pulak. Krg due dah kenape? Ape2 die buat, sala. Kao mane peyh betol? Kao pon takya mcm tooot boleh? Stop adding fuel to the fire. Nie bukan hal kao, kao tutop kao peyh mulot, dok diamdiam sua.

I'm bored ~

I miss Jurong Boys already. Hoho. Rudy msged just now asked if we wanna go Vivo and watch them play takraw. But if I go, confirm tak rase nak alek. & there's supposed to be MalayDance tmr. But taktau still on ke tak. So far, all the practices have been cancelled. Baek ah Abg! Then Helmi pulak ajak watch them play takraw. Aiyo. So tempting. Haha. Nemind ah. Insya'allah besok k besok.

Woke up today due to nenek's shouting over the phone in the kitchen. Then me & Kakak scared to go in the kitchen. We like walking to the kitchen, then Nenek shout, we run back out. Lol. Then I needed to go toilet, kakak wanna get a drink. So we braced ourselves and went in the kitchen. Whenever nenek shout, kite peyh tekejot . . . sampai cawan sume terjatoh. Lol. Sume diam, step takde pape. Padahal tnga takot. Lols.

I don't like attention seekers. & I think you're one.

Yesterday, aunts, uncles and cousins came over to do some shifting in the house. Then found out that mummy was not coming home for the night, and so is CikNana. And AbgRoy wil reach home really late and the only people left in the house would be Nenek, Atok & that freak. So ape lagi? Aku pon tak alek uh. Went to interchange, printed some pictures then met myra and bussed to Jurong. Met Naz, Helmi, Rudy, Ahmad, Ajai & Zul. Lepak under Ahmad's block awhile & then headed to kedai kopi. They blanje us makan AGAIN. Good or what?!

Then went to the playground nearby. I layed down beside Ajai and we started talking. He told me that when they were younger, Has told Ajai that something would happen to him when he reach the age of 17. And Has also said, that when he's gone, whenever we miss him, just look up in the sky. He said that he would be the brightest star, watching over us. All the way as we layed down, I looked up in the sky.

We started talking about ghost and stuff and Ajai really freaked me out till I screamed and sat up so fast that my sides hurt. Then I went to help Dy & Naz record a video of them singing. Then Naz was playing the guitar and Dy was just about to sing when Naz suddenly freaked out and I screamed. It was so funny. He said a bug crawled up his leg. & everything was caught on the vid. Potong steam sia tu bug. Org baru feeling nak nyanyi.

Then I went back to the playground and sat with Helmi. He was looking up at the sky. So I joined, And then I saw it. I saw Has's name in the sky. Helmi told me that he saw the brightest star and said, "Kalao kao betol2 Has, tunjok name kao." And there, we saw it. I was like speechless. I tried very hard to hold my tears back. I just smiled in amazement.

Then I went to join Ajai again. He told me many interesting stories. He doesn't have an easy life eyy. And it was freezing cold, I swear. I was shaking so hard. Ahmad was like going crazy cause it was too cold. Lol. Then Ahmad & Rudy taught me how to play the first part of "Dugaan Dari Illahi" on his guitar. Baekk Ahh! Time past so fast & it was morning again. I didn't even feel sleepy know. Like didnt wanna go home. But went home anyway. Homed, slept.

Woke up due to CikNana's noisy mouth. Nurin & fam was here. & Cik Nana keeps on complaining & complaining & complaining about his room I swear I got so pissed. He threw a tantrum like some kind of spoilt brat. I mean, cmon la. What's done is done, let it go. You cant do anything. I learnt that the hard way, right? Haa.

A friend of Has told me to contact her through youtube. So I called her. & I told her whatever happened on that day and answered her questions. Her name is Nadiah too! Cool. HAHA. She told me her memories with Has and we talked about how he had such a pure heart. Both of us cried. Haha, padahal baru kenal tau. Lol. Sweet girl. Asked her to tag along to Has's grave the day after Hari Raya Haji.   

Then Rudy msged me, at 3.55pm that there is a kenduri for Has at his house after Asar. I was like WHHAAAAAT? Now you tell me? Aku journey sane je 1hr30min. Aiyo. So didnt go. He said Has's mother told them last minute too. Aiyoyo. K then he msged me, said that Has's mother told me to call her. So I did. Haa, not gonna elaborate there.

Okay, I'm bored out of my wits now. Ohya, did I mention that Ain msged me? So sweet right? I miss her sio~ Okayokay, I'm gonna surf the net or something.

When Helmi told me about Ajai's dream, I teared afew drops and smiled. Ajai dreamt that Has came to his dream. Has told us not to cry anymore cause if we did so, he can't go with ease. He told us to apologize to his mother for him for lieing to her. And told us to forgive all his mistakes. He told us to never regret what had happened on that day cause he was happy now. And it was his time.

Eversince I came to know about that, I smiled whenever we talked about him. I didn't cry anymore. I smiled at the thought of his face, his smile. His voice in those videos did made me tear abit. Since then, whenever I cried, I would always be smiling too. He made me proud.

Has, you really did. I'm very proud of you, to have a friend like you. I love you to the core, bro! Always will, I promise. :D

That dream really changed the way I look at things now. I won't cry whenever I think of Has. I'll smile. Cause you see, those who love Has will cry whenever they think of him. But those who love Has with all their hearts, will smile at the memories together and let him go with ease.

Mummy came home just now, and I asked her to on the fan for me cos the switch is beside the door. & she said, "Yer, tuan! Maid baru alek nie! Tunggu yer tuan! Maid tnga bukak kasot." Then I grinned. And nenek said "HAHA, tu pon senyom die. Kan lawa."

What nenek said really made me think back. Because of this, I withdrew myself from everyone, everything except for JurongBoys and Sisters. And it wasn't fair to them. I didnt talk to mummy, nenek, and cik nana in days. I never smiled at them in days. They haven't even seen me eat. I'd just be locking myself up in the room or daydreaming, or shedding some tears. That's all I have been doing around them. I'm gonna change my ways now.

I wanna say sorry to Valerie now. Sorry I couldn't be there when you needed me. Instead, you were there for me everyday. It's just that I withdrew myself from you. I didn't really entertain your msgs. Sometimes, I wouldn't even reply. You didnt deserve that. I'm sorry. I'll be back to my usual self. We'll have fun at the class chalet this Sat, yeah? You will always be my dear partner. You were there with me through everything. We will never drift apart okay? Aku cinta kau jugak!

And I wanna thank abu for your tag. Yeas, i think I remember who you are. Thankyou alot. What you said means so much to me. I will stop crying & will always pray for him. You dont go on losing your mood & stuff too aite. Takecare. :D

I'm gonna start studying hard for my Os. This will be for my beloved Has. He promised to give me his Olevel notes. But since he can't, I'll study all out for him. I'll get into a good poly, okay? I'll make you proud, Has. Though I know you can never be as proud of me as I ever was of you.

I'll repent of my ways. Cause god sent you to me for that 4months. God let me be close to you. You taught me alot of things and advised me on life. You were like my angel. And God's taking you back, where you belong. Do watch over me, Has.

I'll always love you. Forever & ever. We'll meet someday, alright? I love you.

Allahyarham Hasbul'lah left us on 15/11/2009, 6.18pm.

This was his favourite song, sung by Helmi & Rudy, 2 of his best bros.
Please excuse the shaky part of the video. I broke down halfway through.

The bear has a significance. We used to call it Hasbul'lah when he was still with us. & now that he's gone, the bear is all he have to remind us of him.

He had the most amazing voice & would guide his bros & help them catch the tune and lyrics. He had such a beautiful soul and the most amazing smile.

He left us too soon. But god loves him more then us. He was always making sure that everyone was okay and doing fine. I dont regret getting to know him at the last 4months of his life. Cos then, I wouldn't have met the most beautiful soul I would ever know.

Do spare afew minutes listening to his singing. His talent should really be known.